Didn’t You Learn Your F’n Lesson Dude?

jon-gosselin-435

Jon and Kate plus 8, and a proposal to the new gal-pal, Hailey Glassman?

It has been reported by In Touch Weekly that 32 year old Gosselin proposed to his 22 year old girlfriend with a $180 thousand ring.

Now, my first thoughts when I heard that Jon from “Jon and Kate and all those fucking Half Asians” was banging at 22 year old was:

FOR SURE.

Shocking, I know.  I felt this way because God cursed this poor son of a bitch with like 4 times the acceptable amount of children and a raging bitch wife.

So I cheered when I heard he found a piece of ass who had a Pharaoh’s Tomb that wasn’t as wide as the platform gaps on the Long Island Rail Road.  (Kate Gosselin should probably walk around with a sign that says “Watch Your Step, Watch The Gap” so that people don’t fall inside of her vagina.)

But then I see that she actually looks like this:

gf

and he’s already getting MARRIED?

FSN dude.

Come to think of it, if I had a woman destroy my life as much as that slut Kate ruined his, I’d probably go gay.

Nah, I’d probably just sleep with copious amounts of women and wear NINE condoms to ensure my super sperm doesn’t put another 12 buns in the fucking oven.

So, For Sure NOT Jon Gosselin, For Sure NOT his Girlfriend, For Sure NOT Kate.

But For Sure the 8 Little Halflings. They are like mudbloods from Harry Potter.  Only Asian instead of wizards.

FSt8LH.TALMFHP.OAIOW.

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9 Responses to Didn’t You Learn Your F’n Lesson Dude?

  1. Cal Ripken says:

    For Sure NOT Jon Gosselin, For Sure NOT his Girlfriend, For Sure NOT Kate.

    For Sure Cal Ripken.

  2. debo says:

    Those kids will all be in the depths of a heavy cocaine (powder and/or rock) addiction in 10-15 years.

    For Sure Halfings Fully Dependent on Substances

  3. BC says:

    Hey Ladies, let’s play Who Wants to Marry a Korean Guy With 8 Child Support Payments!?!?!

  4. weew31 says:

    FS see a comparison between this bitch and…

    For Sure Fraggle Rock

  5. choot says:

    i really don’t know what you guys are talking about. this girl is FS the classiest human being alive…

    http://www.usmagazine.com/photos/meet-jon-gosselins-new-girlfriend-hailey-glassman?slideshow_id=1151&o=1

  6. Kovach says:

    Case in point that all chicks want is a dude’s man juice. This broad cannot wait to get knocked up.

  7. Steven Sokul says:

    And her dancing makes me want to die

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