Welcome to the FSN Cartoon Smokeshow Elite 8.  All the riff raff has been eliminated.  Every last SS Competitor is a legitimate threat for the Title.

We begin in the Hanna Region:

1. Jessica Rabbit



3. Hello Nurse

FS Nurse

Well what you got right here is two bitches who absolutely know how to work it.  I mean just look at these pictures.  Both these sluts have dudes drooling over them in these pics.

1 VERY important distinction here that really sets Jessica Rabbit apart from a lot of the other competitors – J rabbit has actual humans ready to F her.

All due respect to Yacko and Wacko, but I am gonna trust the opinions of the middle aged dudes at the strip club on this one.  I let the Animaniacs have their threesome with Hello Nurse in the consolation round, Jessica Rabbit is the first SS to move on to the Final Four.

#4 Pocahontas



#2 Lola

FS Lola

Pocahontas turned a lot of heads this Tourney with her unexpected run to the Elite 8.  Whenever your surrounding company is the likes of the Little Mermaid and Princess Jasmine, you’ve proved your legitmacy.

But Lola Bunny is a legend.  Usually the mentioned within the first 3 or 4 top Cartoon SS’s of all time.

Pocahontas has great skin tone, but her hair looks like a black cape or a stage curtain at your school auditorium.

Plus Lola is a rabbit, and we all know rabbits are




There’s a reason why she’s F’ing one of the most legendary Cartoon Characters of all time.  Good work, Bugs.  Your Smokeshow girlfriend is on to the Final Four

#1. Ariel

FS Ariel


#2. Lara Croft*

FSN Lara

Lara Croft has been crowned the Villian of the FSN Cartoon Smokeshow Tournament after revelations of her Performance Enhancing Polygons and her FSNSS Violations.

This battle extended beyond which cartoon character you would fuck if you yourself were a cartoon, or if they could become human.

This is Good vs. Evil.  Old Vs. New.  Pure Vs. Tainted.

Lara Croft came out FIRING with her giant fake tits and her absurd khaki short-shorts.

But Ariel responded with her arched-back, tiny waist, sea shell bra, hair flip move, and the crowd was behind her.

It was like they willed her to defeat the CGI Slut.  Ariel performed like a perfect SS that nite, sending the Smokeshow Asterisk Lara Croft home.

Ariel on to the Final 4

#1 Jasmine



#2 Tinkerbell


Flip. a. coin.

J Christ this is a matchup and a half.  The Kinky Bitch Tinkerbell and the Prissy Smokeshow Jasmine.  GD.

I mean we are gonna have to nitpick here, Nation.  Despite her sexual prowess, Tinkerball is about 4 inches tall and has wings attached to her back.  I mean, I’m not trying to be High Horse Smokeshow Guy, but if I’m making a list of all the things I want in a chick, Wings on her back and fitting in the palm of my hand are not on the list.

Tink, I hate to see you leave, but I love to watch you go


Tink – Call me.  I’ll be in the bedroom with Megara.

FSN Cartoon SS Final Four –

Jessica Rabbit vs. Lola Bunny

Ariel vs. Jasmine


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