TRUMBULL — A California man visiting town is accused by police of trying to mail marijuana to himself — but sending the illegal drugs to the wrong address.

Richard Nyznyk, 48, of Ventura, Calif., was charged with possession of marijuana. He was released after posting $25,000 bond.

According to police, Nyznyk was planning to visit friends in Trumbull, but before he left decided to mail some marijuana to himself at his friends’ Trumbull home.

However, Nyznyk put the wrong address on the package, police said, and it went to the wrong residence in town. The female homeowner arrived home Friday and found a package from “Sweet Cheeks” to “Loverboy” on her doorstep.

When the woman opened the package, she allegedly found several bags of marijuana wrapped in athletic socks, police said. She then called police.

The following day, the woman found a note taped to her door from Nyznyk apologizing for the mixup and giving his phone number, police said.

An officer called the number on the note and, pretending to be the female homeowner, arranged to meet Nyznyk to hand over the package, police said.

When Nyznyk showed up, however, he was arrested.

Ok ok, we can look at the obvious here.  What a dope, mails weed to himself, wrong address, leaves a note, etc etc etc.

But lets look at the most important part of the story:

Dude mails himself under the aliases “Sweet Cheeks” and “Loverboy”?

F

S

N

If I’m mailing myself drugs I’m using the most badass aliases that I’ve always wanted to be.

My shit would be like “From: Megatron To: Michelangelo”

or

“From: Demolition Man To: The Terminator”

For Sure NOT Loverboy and Sweet Cheeks

~Shout out to WeeW for the link

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