2nd Round of play in the FSN Cartoon Smokeshow Tournament

We’ll head back to the Hanna Region…

#1 Jessica Rabbit

FSJR

VS.

#8 Peppermint Patty

FSPP

Put your fucking hand down and shut your Black Hole of a mouth, Patty.  You just EMBARASSED by J Rabbit.  This really was a no contest, as showing up to a smokeshow battle in Birkenstocks and a baggy striped T shirt is poor form.  Have a nice offseason, Patty.  Jess moves on.

#5 Lois Griffin

FSLG

VS.

#4 Daria’s Sister

FSQ

Motherfucker, is this chick a ginger too?  WTF why did all these animators make bitches with red hair?

Anyway, Quinn’s body is SICK.  And she’s another bitch too.  Like she’ll make you go shopping with her and make you listen to all her gossip bullshit but once the lights go down she’s role playing and all sorts of freaky shit.

Lois Griffin has that Real Housewives appeal.  Only problem is that she’s a Housewife to Peter Fucking Griffin and has been getting POUNDED out for years.  Plus, have you SEEN the size of Chris Griffin’s head?  After Lois popped that thing out I could go spelunking in her Tomb.

Quinn takes it down. (Oh no! Another cougar goes down!  You know why? Cuz fucking old chicks is lame)

#6 Alice

FS ALICE

VS.

#3 Hello Nurse

FS Nurse

This one comes down to straight sex appeal, folks.  Ever notice that Alice in Wonderland kinda has a JonBenet Ramsey thing goin on?  I don’t know about you, but JonBenet thoughts are Boner Assassins in my book.  Can’t call you an SS if you remind me of a pre-pubescent beauty queen unsolved murder.  Hello Nurse cruises to the Sweet 16.

#10 Jane

FS Jane

VS.

#2 April

FS April

HUGE matchup here.  April’s Yellow Jumpsuit is a blessing and a curse.  One the one hand, its this sexy onesie which shows some nice cleavage.  On the other, its a one piece with a belt around the waist.  Not exactly easy access.

Jane isn’t exactly a fashion guru either.  She wears a fucking tie for God’s sake.

What this matchup comes down to is the hair – April has the short dumpy bob while Jane has long flowing brown locks.

I’ll take Jane in the Jungle over April in the Sewer anyday.  In a 2nd round 2 seed upset, Jane is headed to the Sweet 16.

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