Taking a look at Rachel’s Track & Field profile here, its clear things would never work out between me and her.
A) 6 feet tall??? Thats like 8 feet tall in chick-height.
B) She’s a middle distance runner at Baylor.
That right there breaks my two cardinal rules for chicks to date.
1) Never date a chick taller than you
2) Never date a chick more athletic than you.
You know, cuz as they say: Its hard to beat your girlfriend when they are stronger than you and faster than you.
Right? Right? Don’t they say that?